I’m Over Regret

He has removed our sins as far from us as the east is from the west.
Psalm 103:12 (NLT)

“Do you know how much I love you?” I used to ask my kids when they were very young.

Their tiny fingers would pinch together as small as possible while still leaving a gap as they’d say with a grin, “This much?” I’d look at them with eyes wide, shaking my head no and stretch my arms as wide and far apart as I possibly could, even pushing them as far behind me as my body would allow and say, “Noooo. Thisssss much!”

Honestly, if I had the power to make my arms come together behind me, I would have done it just to give them a visual of the depths of my love for them. It’s always been so important to me that my kids know they have at least one person in this world who loves them beyond all reason.

We all need that, don’t we?

For much of my life, I couldn’t feel that love—from anyone. I felt very alone, and overlooked, and simply misunderstood by almost everyone in my life.

But there was one person that made a difference. One person that seemed to love me no matter what: my grandmother, Frances. And although I later found out that she told each of her grandchildren that we were her favorite, each time she whispered it to me, she fully made me believe that I was that important to her. That her love for me was unchangeable.

Years later, when I accepted Christ, I found another person in my life that loved me unconditionally.

But, I have to tell you, the fact that He knew every single thing I’d ever done in my life really bothered me. I mean, there were things I couldn’t even bear to think about, much less want someone else to know about. It was one of the difficulties that nearly kept me from getting to know Him in the first place. I mean, have you ever thought about the fact that God sees you naked? Naked, people. It’s too much.

One morning while reading my Bible, Psalm 103:12 nearly knocked me over.

“He has removed our sins as far from us as the east is from the west.”

I just couldn’t get that concept out of my imagination of how far that distance could possibly be. I mean, it’s mindblowing, is it not? And I was quickly reminded of my little game with my children, and how much they loved knowing that someone loved them so deeply.

For most of us, it’s hard to accept that someone like Jesus could love us with all of our flaws, past mistakes, and current actions. But there’s no place for shame and regret in our walk with Christ.

The past is the past. Our mistakes are not only forgiven by Him, but forgotten. Yes, forgotten. Click To Tweet

Do I still look back on mine at times and wish it were different? Absolutely.

After all, there can be lingering repercussions to the poor choices we’ve made in the past.

But, at the end of the day, God knew what I would choose to do in life the very day He made me. He loved me ahead of time, knowing that I wouldn’t live perfectly, or even acceptably at times. He loved me so outrageously, that it defies all logic and common sense. Kind of like attempting to stretch your arms backwards to make a point.

Which, I plan to do over and over again, the day I get to whisper to each of my grandchildren that they are my favorite.

Reflection Questions

What parts of your past are you still holding onto with regret? Spend time in prayer over them, allowing time to listen for God’s voice.

Who can you reach out to and show unconditional love to today? Is there someone who has disappointed you that you can show grace to for their misgivings? Let’s live by Jesus’ example and remove those barriers in order to grow that relationship instead.

Prayer

Father God, we are so grateful for the way you love us. It blows us away that you know everything about us and yet choose to be with us over and over again. Remind us that your love is a gift with no strings attached. We don’t need to strive, or be ashamed, or filled with regret. You’ve already forgiven that which holds us apart from You. We can’t even fathom it, Lord. Help us to be forgiving of others, but especially of our past mistakes and those we’ll continue to make in our lives. We love you so much. In Jesus’ holy name we pray, Amen.

9 thoughts on “I’m Over Regret

Jodie

Sweet friend, your words resonate with my heart. Yesterday, I swept the garage and a burden was brewing for young women. I know that they want love and they will seek it from many places. We all need a Grandma Frances. We all need a mom that showers us again and again with extraordinary love. We all will not have that and but we all have Jesus. I want to wrap my arms around a few dozen young women and let them know about his love.

Reply

    Laura Adams

    So true, Jodie! I often think the same thing. I think I might make a tee that says, “We all need a Grandma Frances” lol. :):):)

    Reply

Carla

Now this is a conversation I can join! I never felt loved or accepted by my parents. My grandparents were detached people. I didn’t know that the way God made me was good let alone who He made me to be. I hated feeling like such a disappointment to the people who were supposed to be my tribe. I felt desperate and disappointed that I couldn’t feel loved. Anger became a big part of my self expression and I left a lot of folks in my wake. I wanted to be loved by someone for who I was. It took me to my 40’s before I began to figure me out. Now, In my 60’s I am finally coming to a place where I accept that God loves me and knew who I was, what I would do from the dawn of time. He has thrown my past into the sea of forgetfulness so I choose to too. I still struggle with regret when I am reminded of my sons, 2 of the people I hurt. Our relationships have been Permanently severed it would appear. The pain I caused them has caused great damage. I have to keep reminding myself that my sin is completely obliterated and the relationships are in his hands. They are better off there anyway. I’m over regret!

Reply

    Laura Adams

    Oh, friend, I hear you. Not feeling that for so many years, but wanting it so desperately, does lead to a lot of backlash. I’m so thankful that you figured out the One who has been there through it all and loves you beyond what you ever needed, wanted, or hoped for. Praying for your sons. Just know that God works in them too, regardless of whether they see it or not. I pray that He nudges their hearts to consider you. And I applaud you for pushing past regret. Let’s do this!

    Reply

Tara Horsley

I was born to two people that I am not for sure who knew His or not.I will explain on down. I knew they loved me. They took care of me,always had food on the table,clothes,shoes, roof over my head. They took care of me,my brother, and my Sister. They went to family holiday at relatives houses. They went shopping for us for clothes and food. My dad work at Allison’s in Indianapolis, Indiana. He has a good job,My mom was a housewife. My mom was around a lot of people because she didn’t work and because she didn’t want to.My dad was only around people at work. I knew my mom and dad love me even through I don’t remember them saying it alot. They said that we weren’t wacky crafting Christian people. They didn’t go to church or read the Bible. They would let us go to church with are grandparents once in awhile. I wasn’t a round people much only going to school. When I move out of my parents,house and years later I started going to church and learn Christ love me. He still loves me today. I really feel love now. I am alot of mistakes in the past but God for gave me. If I had to do my past all over which I can’t I regret that I wasn’t around more Christian women influence. But I am now.I have been saved many years now and been in church. Christ loves me and I love Him.

Reply

    Laura Adams

    Tara, It’s hard to find the right people in your life, isn’t it? But I think it’s so wonderful that you’ve made peace with your past and know what you need in your future: Sisters! So happy to have you here.

    Reply

Nancy Silvers

I have had a long journey going from regret to trusting God and His perfect plan for my life. While I wish I could go back and make different choices I know God can bring beauty out of the ashes. I know I am who I am today because of the things I went through. Looking for real love in all the wrong places led to many poor choices. I can better empathize with women walking through the same poor choices I made and they can see hope in where God has brought me. I cling to Matthew 19:26 in my walk through my broken relationship with my daughter. I know God is working in the unseen world and that gives me tremendous hope. Thank you for sharing this, Laura, love you friend!

Reply

    Laura Adams

    Nancy, I love to hear more of your story and how God has worked in your life. Your closeness to Him is so palpable, I would never have guessed all that you’ve been through. Thank you for sharing. And yes, He most certainly is working toward healing for your family in the unseen. Love you!

    Reply

Cindy K Krall

Such a good word friend. Who could know that His hands spread on the cross also covered the distance from east to west? I’m soaking up your beautiful reminder as we count down the days to Easter! Love you Sis!

Reply

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Get Connected

Sign up for occasional emails, giveaways, info on upcoming retreats, and more! And no worries, we won’t share your personal information or fill your inbox with spam. Eww. We hate spam.

Featured Product

Sisterhood Journal

What is sisterhood? It’s not a club or sorority, but a special kind of soul connection—I can call you sister because you call Him Father.

Read More »